The Unthinkable Relationship
by Harriet R. McMahon, Ph.D.

    When I first heard Juan Nunez del Prado speak of the  “unthinkable relationship” I immediately assumed that he was going to speak of a relationship that we don’t want to engage.  I thought he would speak of the unthinkable relationship as one that was filled with ego and control.  As a healer I thought those words would indicate a relationship that one would want to avoid.  I was wrong.
    What is the unthinkable relationship?  The words that my teachers have used to describe this state of being are truth and integrity.  Integrity is harmony within us; therefore the first unthinkable relationship must be created with self.  To create the unthinkable relationship with oneself and another being is an opportunity to achieve the wonderful principle of the Andes called ayni, which means reciprocity.  In the Andes the Q’ero have the unthinkable relationship with Pachamama (Earth).  They reside at high altitudes in an environment that can be very harsh.  Through ceremony, respect and ayni with the earth they have transcended into the unthinkable relationship. In our shamanic practice ayni is the foundation of all healing, ceremony, ritual and our lives.  When I was in Peru, I was invited to revisit all my relationships to determine if ayni was present and I realized that to obtain unthinkable relationships we must strive to have those relationships devoid of ego.

    The unthinkable relationship is an intimate relationship, which to me means being in a relationship without fear.  The unthinkable relationship invites one to enter into a deeper connection to another soul.  I see the soul as always striving to become pure as it reincarnates from lifetime to lifetime sometimes experiencing difficult lessons as it evolves.  As we enter into these relationships it is an opportunity to share that part of you with another who can support you through this transformation or journey and that you in return can lend support, encouragement and honesty to that person.  How beautiful to share such an intimate and sacred part of oneself and to be safe in doing so.

    As we achieve the unthinkable relationship with another I invite you to consider the “ripple affect” it can have on those individuals who are in contact with you – especially your children.  Imagine what it would have been like to see your mother and father honoring and trusting each other, allowing each other to grow as individuals, accepting individual friendships and activities.  During times of disagreements continuing to practice gentleness, compassion and an understanding that each comes from their own truth – allowing that individual to travel their path and stepping out of that place of ego and control.  I often think of what our world would be like if our religious leaders would teach the concept of the unthinkable relationship – truth and integrity instead of fear and rules and very often their own agenda.  I have observed those who are close to me observe me and how I practice this concept of the unthinkable relationship with others.  They speak of the flow and harmony that exists and how they desire that within their own relationships.

    We have entered a time of cosmic transformation when a tremendous responsibility has fallen on our shoulders for our world to evolve and survive.  It is of importance that all of us revisit our relationships to strive to create the “unthinkable relationship”.  To bring in this spiritual evolution we must all be aware of our thoughts and actions.  Dwelling in fear, anger and distrust of one another helps to create fear, anger and distrust in our world.  I invite you all to revisit your relationships and to strive to transcend into the “unthinkable relationship” beginning with your self, your family and your relationship to our Mother – the earth.  Our thoughts, words, and actions are living energy and if we can each make these shifts within our own lives imagine how much impact it can have on the world.     Munay, Harriet

Peace is all around us – in the world and in nature – and within us – in our bodies and our spirits.  Once we learn to touch this peace, we will be healed and transformed.  It is not a matter of faith; it is a matter of practice.”  Thich Nhat Hanh

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Copyright 1999-2002 Harriet McMahon (Creative Growth and Healing)